Starlight: The Story of Renesmee
by hillary adelheide
Summary: Dreams are true while they last, and do we not live in dreams?" Alfred Lord Tennyson Herein you will find the story of Renesmee: "I am hot and cold, hard and soft. I am the hunter and the hunted, I am the killer who must not kill. I am Renesmee Cullen."


**Firelight: A Jacob and Renesmee Story**

_"Where there is great love, there are always miracles."_

_WILLA CATHER_

**I do not own Twilight or it's characters. I just which I did ;) which is why I write about it rather than writing my own stories which would never be as wonderful or full of literary technique... **

**Well... isn't this awkward? Regardless, I am a pathetic copycat and not the rightful owner. Cheers!**

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I have become a quiet woman.

Well if you knew me as a child you would know that I was just as quiet then. If you never knew me at all you would believe I was still a child. My childhood was beautiful and in so many ways so short... less than ten years. Time passes differently here in the chilly wilderness niche I call my home. It can't be measured by the leaves on the trees or by the coming and going of snow and ice. Rather the years are better measured by remembrance. How long ago was it I first heard my mother's voice? A moment? Nine years? Never matter that, in my immortal life it was but a moment. The subtle change in the forest happens as does the passing of day into night... This is why I am silent most days. Observant and intuitive yes, and more than that I don't need to speak to show you my opinion.

I walked slowly through the undergrowth at the top of my favorite cliff, the meeting place of water, earth, and sky. The sun sparkled subtly on my white skin. I had the appearance of delicacy and yet my form was not prone to give under contact. I am hard and soft. I am a million things that contradict each other by their very natures. I am human, and I am vampire. I am a killer who must never kill, I am a cold one who runs hot. I am half hunter, and I am half my own prey. I am the product of the lion and the lamb.

My bronze hair tickled my lower back in the afternoon breeze.

I was enjoying one of the few sunny days in La Push and basking in my unusual ability to stroll in the sunlight. It was really just a coincidence that today happened to be sunny, though my Aunt Alice had told me cheerily that morning. I was really hoping the day would pass by rather quickly. I felt out of sorts without my best friend at my side. It was rare to be so far away from the rest of my family, but to be more than a foot from Jacob was unnerving. I understood that he had duties as a werewolf alpha but his absence left me distraught. I missed his comfort and his great hulking presence at my side at all times. My best friend who would always reserve a perfectly white, wolfy, most Jacob-ey smile for me. I knew that he wouldn't have given up this time to spend with me at all if it hadn't been for important pack matters.

I wove my way down to the beach gracefully. Thankfully I had dressed in my mother's closet today and had been able to escape the house in jeans. I loved my aunts dearly but really, I was so sick of wearing party dresses for no reason. I sat down lithely at the water's edge and fidgeted with the woven bracelet I had worn since my first Christmas. Jacob had given it to me, he who had changed so little while my entire lifespan had progressed. Really I had no idea what this meant. Jacob, who had always been to me, MY Jacob... I knew what this bracelet represented in Quileute Culture.

It was supposed to be some sort of Quileute promise ring. Lately I was confused by it.. Jacob had given it to me so long ago, and then I had not understood its meaning. It was a gift, from my big wolfie friend... now it felt like a brick tied to my leg. Did I even have a choice to give it back if so I wished? Had I ever had a choice in this promise? Technically my thought processes had become mature long ago according to my father. A mind reader. There is nothing on this Earth more annoying than having a mind reader for a father. Apparently my cognitive reasoning skills were well developed. I knew that for the most part, at least for my species, I was an adult.

The part that had me worried was that I was becoming rather physically matured. Carlisle had been fascinated when (to my embarrassment at the utter lack of privacy in my family) I had a stupid menstrual cycle. Really? Being an immortal half vampire and all, I still had to deal with mundane annoyances like this disgusting one? I would have died from embarrassment if it were possible. I mean, everyone was really happy that I can apparently procreate and all, as truly vampire females obviously can't, but why did everyone even have to know? Thank God my mother remembered being human in a way my aunts didn't. Thank God she even remembered how to, you know. Use all that stuff.

Either way, apart from ...that... and growing a quite ample chest for my petite frame, my face had even changed in the last months. I could see the planes of my face were sharper and a tiny bit more angular. My childish cheeks were completely gone. Even my behind had grown a little plumper and rounder as my hips widened slightly. I knew I wasn't really perceived as a child anymore. So when was Jacob going to start expecting more?

I had been allowed to register in school this year, pretending to be a transfer student going into my Junior year. The classes were easy enough, but it was the social interactions in the humans that intrigued me. I was popular enough, had friends and all, but I watched every day as girls mooned over boys and boys nervously asked them to movies, and I didn't understand. I mean I understood the convention, but it left me confused on how to handle it... These girls had a choice. How were you supposed to initiate something... something so different... with someone you had known your entire life? How did it change?

How was Jacob going to quit being my best friend and start being more? Did I even want that? The idea was not at all unpleasant.... I couldn't think of anyone else I would want, but how did the transition occur? Was he going to stop being my Jacob? My very best wolfy Jake? I wished we could stay friends, just friends, forever, if that meant I never had to lose who he was to me now.

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**Author's Note: Thanks for reading! Now see that little button that allows you to comment? Press it! Then tell me what you think! By the way, The beautiful life, the most beautiful dead is going to take a slight backseat. See, the notes and research required for its completion are on my laptop which is not working at the moment. I just don't want to start over. But there ARE still thirteen chapters to read if this one isn't long enough... heehee**


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